Gretel and Ezekiel

Today shall be known forever as….

The Day I Almost Bought A Cow

Dramatic, I know.


It all started a couple days ago, during a conversation about cheese and how Linda was a bad vegan because she likes cheese (she’s now a vegetarian). I made the argument that as long as the cows were happy, vegans should be able to eat things made with their milk. Linda agreed, but said she was pretty sure that cows have their babies taken away and so probably aren’t very happy.

Enter Google. Search term: “How do cows produce milk?”

I found a very informative website. Check it out.

Turns out, cows produce milk only after they’ve had their first baby cow, but then they’ll keep making milk as long as they’re being milked. And….they have to be relaxed in order to make milk, so lots of dairy farmers play soothing music during milking time. Conclusion….all milk comes from happy cows. Therefore, milk is vegan-friendly.

Bring on the cheese.

I should probably admit that this is the only website I looked at. And it’s from Australia. So, it’s quite possible that only Australian cows are happy, and American cows are miserable. I’m choosing to be ignorant. Or misinformed.


The thought of happy cows makes my heart happy, so of course I had to share this news. And then this happened.

Cow ConvoI did look into it. Turns out there are small-breed cows that only produce 1-2 gallons of milk every day. Which is still a lot of milk, but much more manageable than 5-6 gallons a day. FROM ONE COW. Unfortunately, they need about an acre to graze…each….and my yard is just a little over half an acre. Sigh.

Photo from Mother Earth News

Aren’t they adorable??

The photo is from Mother Earth News. It’s a pretty good article about cow ownership…

It would have been amazing. Fresh milk…a warm happy cow….cheese….

Needless to say, my dream is now to own enough land to have cows.

And alpacas. And ponies. Because I’ve been given permission for those too…..

Pony Alpaca ConvoAnd no, I’m not kidding. One day…perhaps when I’m old and retired…I will have all sorts of farm animals and a huge veggie garden and I will be cranky and a hermit. But I will continue blogging, so you’ll get to read all about it. Sounds fun, right?

I think Jimmie is on board with this idea, though clearly for different reasons.

Side note – I am going to look into the state of American cows and adjust my purchasing accordingly. I don’t want to drink angry milk.